Tuesday 21 July 2015

Leaked Script of Pakistani remake of bajrangi bhaijaan.

Internet is abuzz with the news that famous Pakistani director, Abdul Saleem Khan, is going to remake blockbuster bollywood movie "bajrangi bhaijaan". The film will be titled "Osama bhaijaan" and will star superstar Mushtaq Musharraf in the title role essayed by Salman Khan in the original.
We have managed to get our hands on the script of the movie and below is a brief synopsis of the plot.

"Osama Bhaijaan is a devout muslim, who offers namaz 5 times a day. He is a huge fan of Pakistani cricket team and particularly of Ahmad Shehzad. Other than indian cricketers, he dislikes Tilakratne Dilshan the most and believes that he will face the fire.
One day a little girl named Munni runs into him. Osama bhaijaan takes pity on the this girl and brings her home. He decides to find her family and take her home. He asks her but is shocked to learn that she is not able to speak. So he gets a great idea. He tells her to raise her hand whenever she hears the name of her place. A couple nights later, Osama bhaijaan is having a meeting at his home with his business partners. During the meeting one of the partners asks, "When will I get to infiltrate the borders and kill those infidel Indians?"
Before Osama bhaijaan can answer, his eye catches Munni standing with her hand raised.
Confused, Osama bhaijaan ends the meeting abruptly and sends everyone home. He closes the door and immediately grabs Munni by her shoulders and asks her if she is from India? Munni nods her head in affirmation and Osama bhaijaan immediately tells her to go in her room. He spends the night thinking and finally comes to a decision to help this girl.
Next morning, he takes her to local masjid, gets her converted and marries her himself.
The end."

Disclaimer : Since we are living in times where Adarsh liberals will outrage on anything that does not suit their narrative, I would like to state that this is purely a work of fiction and my only intention is to mock the country of losers called Pakistan. If you equate my work with Indian Muslims and consider it an attack on Islam, then you clearly are an Adarsh liberal and I will suggest you to book a plane ticket to the land of ISIS. India will be better off without your outraging bigotry. Thank you.